i had a small glimmer of hope today that i would actually be going to the fair. my sister, nevernakedbeth, said that she would go with me. she rearranged everything so that she could go. so that WE could go, more importantly.
i have, honestly, never felt so very loved in my entire life. because you have to know that thursday, the day we would leave for the fair, is her daughter, heather's, 13th birthday. which is a pretty darn significant birthday. and beth's birthday is on monday. the day we'd be making the very very very long drive back from oregon.
and yet? she was more than willing to forget about all of that to make sure i went to the fair. because i always go to the fair. and i shouldn't miss it this year, either. so she said we should just go! even if it's not her thing. we should just do it. get in the car and go.
as i said, i've never felt more loved. this is HUGE. especially if you knew the history between me and nevernakedbeth. we love each other fiercely now, but our childhood was marked with many years of not liking each other very much at all. in fact, we could barely tolerate each other. and love was not a word in our vocabulary.
but....
i also know that nevernakedbeth's FAMILY is very important to her. and it is heather's birthday. and her son, justin, is leaving for camp on monday. not to mention it is her own birthday on monday. i can't really ask her to abandon her own family just to accompany me to oregon so that i can not miss the fair.
the truth is, i can miss the fair. the fair can miss me. it is just one fair in a long and amazing history of fairs. there will be another fair next year. i have no idea where i will be next year, but i will absolutely plan to be in oregon on the second weekend in july. because that is where i belong. always.
this year, i will be here. celebrating family birthdays. which, quite
frankly, i should be celebrating. family is important, i am learning.
very important. they love us best. i may be slow to learn that lesson,
but it is a lesson i am glad to finally learn.
that photo is all the cousins at the wedding. can you believe i'm the oldest? i am! by a lot!
