We're in metrograde. It's a term my dear friend Shannon came up with to describe Mercury Retrograde. And it doesn't surprise me that we entered it and all hell is breaking loose all over the globe. And yes, people, I realize that Mercury Retrograde is mostly in my own imagination. I get it. But I also know that every single time we go into metrograde, well, shit hits the fan.
So is it any wonder that since we are in metrograde and since I know that when we are in metrograde any number of strange things can happen and will happen and certainly do happen that when I decided that perhaps I really did want a new place to lay my head at night, a new mailing address, a new roof over the puppies' heads, that I decided to pull out the major artillery?
"Heather, it's Jennifer, is your mother there?"
"Um, no, she's at the Temple."
"She is? Why?"
"She went to pray for your new house! Didn't you ask her to do that?"
"Um, well, yes I did. But I didn't think she'd really do it?!"
"Well, she did. She's there. She's praying so you'll get it."
"Heather, that's why I'm calling. It must have really worked. I got the house!"
"Whoo hoo! Of course it worked. You don't pray in the Temple and not have it work!"
Now I know what you're thinking. How absolutely hypocritical of Nakedjen to ask her Mormon sister to go and pray in the Temple for her. For a house of all things. A house! The entire world economy is about to go completely belly-up and Nakedjen has her sister in the Temple praying about a house. Just for her!
Well, people, it does feel rather hypocritical. I didn't really believe that my sister, NeverNakedBeth, was truly going to go to the Temple and pray for me. I mean I called her and asked her to do it, but I didn't think she really would?! She's a busy mother with two kids. She has umpteen meetings all day long. She doesn't have time to go to the Temple and pray about a house for her sister and her two fur kids.
She did do it, though. And it was exactly at the moment that NeverNakedBeth walked out of that Temple that I received the call from the new landlord telling me that I was going to be moving to a very lovely house. A house without holes in the walls. A house with insulation. A house with a new water heater. A house that has a fenced back yard for the dogs. A house that can truly be our home.
We're moving on Monday. Breaking all my own rules about contracts and metrograde, I signed the lease. Bye bye crack house. Hello happy home! Thank goodness for Mormon sisters with Temple recommends.
