My Journey To Get Here

Nevada is one very wide and rather boring state to cross.  Having David Sedaris read outloud to you whilst you are driving across this very wide and rather boring state makes it a lot more fun.  Especially if your other two traveling companions happen to only speak black Labrador.  I'm quite eloquent and fluent actually in my speaking of black Labrador, but I will admit that I get a sore throat from all the deep grrrrs.  So the respite that was David making me laugh was quite welcome.

The second respite that was even more welcome was my landing upon the doorstep of Mimi and Steve's to surprise Steve for his birthday.  It is always a joy to meet the readers of my blog in person!  Mimi and Steve are fantastic fabulous folks who have been lovingly supporting me this last year in ways that I can never repay.  The love we all shared Saturday evening was just palpable.  I am truly blessed that they are part of my life. 

As I reached highway 17, the last road that stood between me and Santa Cruz, my stomach flip flopped and it wasn't unlike the many times I arrived at the gates of St. Andrew's after a vacation.  It was a unique phenomenon that many of the students at my boarding school often talked about...the stomach flip flop drop.  A mix of excitement and dread and nausea all at the same time.  You're not exactly sure why it is even happening because in your head you are absolutely certain you're happy to be back at school with your friends.  But somewhere in your heart (or maybe it is exactly the other way around) you are not at all certain that you want to be there at all.  It happened every time.  In fact, even when I returned for my 25th high school reunion just last June it happened again.  All I was doing was arriving for a party, yet my stomach did the whole familiar flip flop drop.

So yes.  Flip, flop, drop.  Accompanied on the esophagus by nausea.  I wasn't certain I could actually make it over highway 17 without having to pull the car to the side of the road to redeposit the contents of my stomach.  However, I kept telling myself that there was so much waiting for me on the other side of that hill.  So very much love, so very much goodness, so very many hugs.  I just had to get there.  Just.had.to.get.there.

I got there. 

Melting into Grace's warm, welcoming, loving embrace the flip flop drop dissipated.  I nearly burst into tears I was so happy and relieved after the long personal journey it took me to get to this point, to this moment, to this spot right here.  Of course the dogs knew that someone still needed to vomit, so Stella took it upon herself to vomit up the entire contents of her stomach.  Good dog.  Thank you, Stella.

I may not live in Santa Cruz anymore, but I still absolutely have a home here.   And so do my dogs.

Comments

[bornfamous]

Yay! The puppies look so happy. Did you find a legal dog beach?

[ronfortoby]

Maybe we should rename you chuckerJen. Or technicolorLaughingJen.
Can you sing in black lab? (question from Sam) 'cause if you can that passes time.
Have a great holiday, thinking of you always.

[LizP]

Thank you for sharing pictures of the ocean. It's one of the things I miss about the bay area.

I hope you have a fabulous visit!

[Yvonne]

I'm so glad you're home. I can't wait to see you!

[mossum]

Jen, we were both so happy you made a stop here along the way. It's trite and true that we feel like we had already known you. Sharing our humble abode with you was like being graced with a visit from a sister we hadn't been able to see in awhile. Buddha and Stella were a blast, too! (Good girl, Stella, for taking over the puking duties for your mom!) Do stop by again on your way through.

PS - No baby yet!