nakedjen

Is This The Droid I Am Looking For?

December 30 Ad. What advertisement made you think this year?

My friends who know how devoted I am to all things Apple are quite aghast that I do not own an iPhone.  Those who know me near and dear and really well, though, also know that it is a wonder that I have a cellphone at all.  I’m a child of the 70’s.  Give me a princess phone and a long cord with which to entangle myself and I’m good.  Of course, I probably will not actually answer that phone if it rings, but that’s a whole other matter.  At the moment, truthfully, I do not even have a home telephone.

All that said, the commercial for The Droid truly captured my attention and imagination.  I actually may, just may, have to get a new cellphone this year.  I know!  And if I do have to do such a thing?  This commercial for The Droid (as well as AT&T’s lousy coverage in SLC) has me convinced that it may just be the piece of technology that brings me kicking and screaming right into the year 2010. 

Blog This!

December 27 Social web moment. Did you meet someone you used to only know from her blog? Did you discover Twitter?

In a word:  Blogher.  Enough said.

Holmes for the Holidays

“There’s a blog post in this!,” I exclaimed to the Outlaw and his daughter yesterday when we were foiled not once, not twice but three times in our attempt to go to see Sherlock Holmes.  My experience, the previous year, with movies on Christmas day in Salt Lake had been cavernous, empty, theatres.  Me and the lonely boy selling stale popcorn.  I am not joking.  Even the evening screening of Benjamin Button had just me and about seven other souls.  As that was my first year for films on Christmas Day in Salt Lake City, I concluded that I was now in a land where people actually chose to celebrate the holiday with their families and perhaps even, gasp, in those temples to God that they erect so carefully on nearly every block. 

Either all the Mormons have left Utah or we’ve been inundated with a whole new population of Robert Downey, Jr. fans who decided that yesterday was a day of worship at his altar.  I am uncertain which it truly is, the 2010 census may tell us.  I can tell you that all showings of Sherlock Holmes within a 30 mile radius of my little bungalow were SOLD OUT.  Forever and ever, Amen.

This was quite disconcerting.  Who were all these people and why were they going to the movies on Christmas?  What happened to turkey and stuffing and football and spending time playing with the new toys delivered from Santa?

Heathens!

Briefly, ever so briefly, the three of us considered a festival of films on the couch, in the comfort of my tiny bungalow, but that truly felt sacrilegious to me in ways that perhaps only the most dedicated of film lovers can possibly understand.  I threw a spectacular temper tantrum worthy of any five year old and became a woman possessed, a girl determined to have Holmes for my holiday!

Do you dance the Fandango?  I’ve been going to films at movie theatres for how very many years?  Always just purchasing my own ticket right at the box office from a smiling teenager.  Yesterday, though, I learned a new dance.  Oh, Fandango and your paper bag puppets how very much I now love you and will sing your praises. 

Click of a mouse and we had three guaranteed seats for a late afternoon screening of Sherlock Holmes.  Thank goddess for all things technical and web controlled, as when we arrived the screening was, of course, SOLD OUT because, as discussed previously, we are now home here in Utah to every single Robert Downey, Jr. fan on the entire face of the planet.

Now, about the film.

My first words when it concluded? 

“Well, that was Guy Ritchie’s Brokeback Holmes!”

Please don’t let that dissuade you from going to see this film.  It is, actually, a really great Christmas present wrapped up in a fantastic steam punk bow.  Robert Downey, Jr. is awesome as Sherlock Holmes.  The man can act more with a raised eyebrow than a lot of his cohorts these days and while I’ll admit right here that I have loved that man since, well, since we were both small children and he was in my friend, John Sayles’ film Baby It’s You, he’s just gotten better and better and better.  He delivers a Sherlock we want to both hug and love.

Jude Law is equally lovely as Watson and the two of them together create just the right underlying, unspoken tension to keep things interesting.  It’s a good match, much like Redford and Newman, honestly. 

Welcome back to Guy Ritchie who has been missing for far too long.  He utilizes his bag of tricks to keep things really stylized, interesting and lovely to watch, even when the script itself was going in places it should not have gone.  In these days of kids who are spoon fed on Harry Potter and National Treasure, and, even,Indiana Jones, Sherlock Holmes delivers as an exciting ride with just the right mix of mystery, explosions and comedic fun. 

 

My Life Just Works

December 23 Web tool. It came into your work flow this year and now you couldn't live without it. It has simplified or improved your online experience.

Was there a web tool I discovered?  That helped with my own work flow?  No.  I don’t think that there was, honestly.  Which is actually quite remarkable considering my entire life used to actually be all about the Internet and creating tools to make using it easier for others. 

I want to shout out, right now, that my life now feels a smidge more complete and robust since I have stepped away from the computer.  I am oh so very thankful, every day, for the Internet and all that it affords me, but I also have to acknowledge that I live in deep gratitude for the people who share their lives with me every day in real life. 

Just A Woman Who Blogs

December 6 Workshop or conference. Was there a conference or workshop you attended that was especially beneficial? Where was it? What did you learn?

I went, I blogged, I twitted, I hugged, I laughed, I cried, I got naked, and I found 100 new blogs.  That was my goal.  100 new blogs by writers I found interesting because they were just as passionate about their own subjects as I am about mine. I wanted to up the ante on my Google Blog Reader (I actually now follow over 1,000) and truly start to show up and participate beyond my cozy corner of the blogosphere.  

Blogher was like no other conference I’ve ever attended before (and as a refugee from the Silicon Valley start-up madness, I've attended lots of tech conferences) and I’m grateful that I managed to actually show up this year.  I learned I really am a woman who blogs. I think that, for me, that was the most important lesson of all.

A Magic Bus of An Entirely Different Color

My trip to Santa Cruz was sublime.  No, honestly, it was truly a trip that was chock full of love and goodness.   I am a girl who is, above all else, well loved.  I don't always truly appreciate just how well loved I am nor do I understand exactly how this actually came to pass, this well loved business? 

I do love with abandon, it is true.  I always have.  If I love you, I give you everything I've got and I never hold back.  I sparkle with it, shine it on you, beam it all in your direction. 

Still, I am not that awesome.  Nor am I someone who has ever been very good at the accepting of praise or kindness or love thrown in her direction.  I'm working on it, I am.  I want to be much better at it, I do.  Because I know that this love expression is a two way street.  I can not just keep beaming it out, shining it all over, splattering it about without actually scooping it up and letting it rain down on me, as well.  It's just hard, sometimes, to take off the galoshes and the rain coat and put away the umbrella and truly wallow in the love.

But I did just that over the weekend in Santa Cruz.  Oh did I wallow.  Soaked and sopped and filled myself to overflowing.  The people of Santa Cruz, my dear and lovely friends, they love well.  They truly do.

I was also the recipient of many beautiful gifts. 

Again, I love giving gifts, but all those who know me intimately will share with you that I'm not so very good at receiving them.  I'll gush and make a huge fuss over the fact that you've thought of me, insist that you shouldn't have, thank you profusely and then....I'll leave the very gift you've given me right on your dining room table.  Completely forget to take it home.  It is TERRIBLE, I know.  Awful.  I'm a horrible recipient of kindness and love and all things beautiful.  Don't waste it on me!

One gift I did receive didn't need wrapping in fancy paper or even un-fancy paper.  The good and kind and lovely large hearted Max (who I am tempted to tell you is a savior dressed in every day clothes) has been my friend in Santa Cruz perhaps the longest of all my friends.  No, really.  We've been friends for what feels like forever plus another day after that.

He provided me a very soft bed, a softer pillow and chocolates on this visit.  Max and I are always sharing the latest and the best finds on the Internet as we're both fans of things that open our minds and our hearts.  This time he had a beautiful present for me.

The Moth.

I can't believe that I had not heard it before.  I'm sure most of you probably already know all about it and shame on all of you for not telling me sooner.  Of course we receive the gifts we're to receive exactly when we're to receive them so I'm certain The Moth came flitting into my life at precisely this moment because this was the moment I needed it to arrive.  However, that doesn't let you off the hook for not sharing.  I'm all about the sharing!

The Moth, for those of you who don't know, is a not-for-profit story telling organization that encourages people to tell real stories without notes to an audience.  It is fantastic.  No, truly.  It is superb.  I can not get enough of it.  It is available on a podcast, but it is also available on many public radio stations nationwide.  Of course, I'm going to be lobbying those good people up at KUER to start broadcasting it for these fine beautiful people in Salt Lake City, but in the meantime, I can always listen to the podcasts.  Thank goddess for the Internet.  Isn't it just a beautiful thing?

I'm sharing with you one of my most favorite stories that I've heard thus far.  Honestly, this woman, Bokara Legendre, well, I can only hope to be as fabulous as she is one day in my life in the not so distant future.  Let's face it, I'm a divorcee myself.  With an outlaw for a lover at the moment.  I believe in the healing powers of potions.  Can my own story such as this be too far away?

Do give it a listen.  I promise, it will give you a smile, a delight, some love. From me to you.  Because we all know, I really like to spread the love around.

And Sometimes You Get An Award!

Sometimes, you just get an award for your blog for no particular reason at all.  I'm all about coming in first.  My sisters will tell you that since I'm the oldest of the three children in our family, since I'm the first grandchild, since I'm just FIRST, period, I like to win and I always get A's and I always have to be first, thank you very much. 

So, when the lovely Stephanie bestowed this blog award on my little blog, I wanted to be oh so gracious and say some kind words that would make even Audrey Hepburn blush, but of course life and travel and all that sex got in the way and here I am WEEKS later, frumpy and unkempt, not even dressed for the occasion and hoping that all of you will just know that I'm grateful, GRATEFUL, to have been acknowledged by such a lovely person.  At all.  The blog world is full of amazing and talented and truly expressive and fun writers.  I'm just glad someone bothered to notice this one.

So this award came with RULES!?!?  We all know I'm the girl that bristles at rules, likes to break the rules, hardly follows rules, would rather ignore the rules, but for Stephanie?  I'll abide the rules. 

The rules say in order to accept this award I have to answer the following questions with only 1 word answers...

1. Where is your cell phone? missing.
2. Your hair? blonde
3. Your mother? here
4. Your father? crazy
5. Your favorite food?Indian
6. Your dream last night? rollercoaster
7. Your favorite drink? kombucha
8. Your dream/goal? self-sufficient
9. What room are you in? kitchen
10. Your hobby? holistic
11. Your fear? baglady
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? london
13. Where were you last night? here
14. Something you aren't? mean
15. Muffins? cranberry
16. Wish list item? peace
17. Where did you grow up? washington
18. Last thing you did? run
19. What are you wearing? nothing
20. Your TV? missing
21. Your pets? adored
22. Your friends? multitudes
23. Your life? blessed
24. Your mood? happy
25. Missing someone? lots
26. Vehicle? Honda
27. Something you're not wearing? clothes
28. Your favorite store? sundance
29. Your favorite color? orange
30. When was the last time you laughed? yesterday
31. Last time you cried? october
32. Your best friend? beautiful
33. One place that I go over & over? dogpark
34. One person who emails you regularly? universe
35. Favorite place to eat? san francisco

I now have to gift this to 6 other bloggers.  Only six.  I could make a list five times as long.

Gwendomama

Miss Grace's Disgrace

The Aloft Blog

Smithical

LaFlacaD

Purvis Family

All of those blogs are blogs worth checking out if you have not checked them out already.  I read them all for very different reasons, but I can also claim the writers of all those blogs as very dear friends.  Which for me is something I hold dear and true.  I'd give them all an award just for that.  They come FIRST in my heart. 

My Best Compliment From Utah

"It's very refreshing to meet a woman over 40 who has real tits." ~ a.s.

Yesterday was my blogiversary (if we're all keeping track of such things, which, well, I suppose I am since I mentioned it) and I attempted to write words and more words about the meaning of Nakedjen to me, but I got all verklempt and somehow my words actually failed me.  Words failing me.  I know, you all just fell off your chairs.  I'm sorry if you didn't have a very soft landing. 

Anyway, I wanted to write about how I started this blog because I truly wanted to empower women to embrace the bodies that they had, right here, right now and not the bodies that our media is constantly throwing their way and telling them they should have instead.  I also wanted everyone to know that this, this right here, is what a real naked woman on the Internet looks like and you don't have to pay for it to see it. 

Six years ago, when I started this blog, it was rather rare to see normal people actually posting naked photos of themselves on the Internet for anyone to see.  Now, well, that has all changed and you just type "naked" in google and can waste your entire workday looking at gobs and gobs of amazingly beautiful bodies of all sizes and shapes and colors.  

We also now have a major women's magazine, Glamour, using models more representative of real women in their magazine.  Women who look like us, instead of a photoshopped Barbie.  Dove has started a program aimed at our teens to encourage them to love their bodies and embrace them.  The movements are small, but they're happening.  It's truly encouraging and makes me smile. 

I'd like to think, in some small way, I helped to foster these bold moves.  I probably did not, but there's that small little part of me that wants to think that because I encouraged all of you to celebrate your bodies, to get naked, to say, I love me, that you did.  That your love spread to our media which then responded in kind.   

Whether you did or you did not publicly, I will share that legions of you did share yourselves with me privately and I thank you for that.  It is your bold nakedness that you've shared, over the last six years, the secrets, the joy, the awakenings that have kept me writing in so many ways.  I don't thank those of you who truly share yourselves with me nearly enough.  I have never shared your stories on nakedjen as a conscious choice because they're your stories, not mine, to share and it feels like I shouldn't expose you.  I choose to be naked on the Internet.  Obviously, you know your stories are safe with me and I just wanted to say, again, how grateful I am to all of you for taking the time and being brave enough to share them all with me.

I considered, truthfully, calling it a day with Nakedjen recently.  That perhaps I had said all that needed to be said.  That I had bared enough.  That it was time to put my clothes back on and shut up.  However, I know that even if I do choose to put my clothes back on, I still have a lot that I want to share, that I want to say, that I need to say. 

I am a natural born blogger.  I am also a born activist.  For body, mind and dogs.  And for so very much more.  So I will keep blogging.  I hope that all of you will keep reading.  And perhaps, occasionally, be brave enough to also get naked.

It's the fifth of October and the summer is gone...

Just like that summer packed up her bags, put away her skimpy bikini, tossed in her flip flops and laughed at me as she waved goodbye whipping down the lost highway in her convertible with nary a glance in her rear view mirror.  I know she's just a few hundred miles away, basking in her oh so heavenly non-tourist glow that only the locals truly get to enjoy at that favorite beach of mine, but she's most definitely deserted me.  Left me here with nothing but polar fleece and my Ugg boots and actual snow flakes falling from gray skies.  What kind of tease is she?  Didn't she know that I was only kidding when she was forcing me to sweat through 100 degree plus days about wanting her to leave, already?  Oh summer, your heart is just so finicky.

Meanwhile, I could probably purchase summer and keep her in a box, letting her out whenever I fancied, if I could only comprise a way in which to monetize the copious amounts of email that currently plague my in-box.  I am uncertain how this happened and I'm certain there are others who live in public who must have similar issues, but recently I broke my Gmail account.  Broke it. 

Yes, Mercury was retrograde, but that was not the issue.  Or perhaps it contributed, but the real issue was that I had gone over the space allotted to my account.  There was no more room at the Gmail inn for any more mail.  The box was full.  Could not stuff one more Nigerian in there.  Not.a.single.one.

So I did what any reasonable woman would do in such a situation. Any reasonable woman who often does colonics every few months to purge all the stuff that is clogged in her colon, that is.

That huge whooshing sound that you all heard last week was not the tsunami hitting Samoa but me hitting the delete key and purging over 500,000 emails all received, read and archived from before October 2008.   

I wasn't choosy.  I wasn't particular.  I wasn't even careful.  I just hit select all and delete.  Which means that all correspondence about my life with, my love of, my marriage to David is now gone.  Poof!  
Gone, too, though are the loving and kind letters of support that came from so very many friends in the aftermath.  Also gone are all those emails of hate that I've received over the years for being so very naked on the web.  I get lots of those.  And then there are the letters that caused me to just pause, think, wonder? I was saving them, I suppose, to perhaps answer some day.  But when?

I realized, after it was all gone, particularly all that correspondence with David, how much lighter I felt.  How I was breathing more easily.  It was old, ancient history in so many ways.  History that has most certainly informed the me that I am today, but history that won't change the me that I am today.

Sometimes, as those of us who regularly cleanse our colons know, it is necessary to do a complete cleanse, a full purge, in order to open our hearts, our minds, our souls for the new that is waiting to come. 

It was just email, but it was representative of so very much more.  A history that was informing me and holding me still. 

Summer packed up and drove away.  While I pull on my wool sweater, I'll contemplate my purged in-box and start to dream about the very special words that might now fill it, the arms that might wrap around me to hold me close and the heart that will keep me warm.

Now For Sale on ebay, NakedJen

Yesterday, Naked Friday found me at none other than the ebay campus located in San Jose.  And because it was Naked Friday and because I am NakedJen,  I did what all of you would most certainly have wanted me to do.

I got naked!

And took pictures to document it, of course.

You know, since the very early days of this blog, when I first started posting naked photos of myself, not a week goes by that I do not receive at least one (and sometimes many more) email request from folks asking me to please send me an actual photograph of myself.

I have never done this.

But today that is about to change.

Since I took the photos at ebay yesterday I thought, "Hey, Nakedjen, why not offer to autograph those photos (or any photo really) of yourself from ebay and actually sell them on ebay while you're at it?"

DearSweetReaders of Nakedjen.  Those of you who have written in the past and asked for a photo of me, who have requested that I send you an actual glossy naked photo...

Now's your chance. 

I've set up an auction on ebay and you're free to purchase as many photos as you like.  Not only that, but you can choose to have whatever photos you'd like to have printed.  Your only limitation is that it has to have already appeared on Nakedjen or my Flickr site.  Meaning that I'm not going to go take a "new" photo just for you.

But if there's any particular photo among my photos that really captures your fancy and that you'd love to have, well, it's yours.  You just have to win the auction on ebay and as fast as you can say "NAKEDJEN" it will be printed by my professional photo shop (no laser jet or ink jet printing here!), autographed for you in whatever way that you'd like (I'll say anything, but I think you know that by now) and sent right off to you courtesy of the kind folks at the USPS. 

Our internet connection is acting all wonky here at Chez Naked tonight so of course I don't have all the fab photos we took yesterday at ebay up on my flickr account yet, but you can certainly check out the auction right here.  You also know there are literally hundreds of OTHER photos to choose from both on Nakedjen and Flickr if having an ebay photo just isn't exactly the photo you want to grace your bedside table (because we all know that's where you're going to put this, right?)  HAR!

Anyway, happy bidding to all!  And yes, I know this is very silly.  Perhaps one of my silliest stunts, yet.  But I promise this isn't an April Fool's!