A couple of weeks ago, I was enjoying a Chinese New Year celebratory dinner with a group of my professor's colleagues and somehow I shared that I had attended a boarding school on the East Coast for high school. A school where every moment of every day was truly regimented. Tick tock we were always told where to be and what we were supposed to be doing. We actually had to get ourselves up and sign in at breakfast every single day no later than 7:30 a.m. on the dot and from there our days continued complete with a dress code to follow and all kinds of rules that would make most of you laugh at loud thinking about Nakedjen not only being agreeable but, you know, showing up and complying. The other professors at the dinner found it hard to believe that I thrived in this environment, but I explained that I appreciated the structure and I really loved that the school provided me truly expansive and safe space for my mind to flourish.
Those who were there with me, who went to that tiny little school in Delaware, all have their own stories to share. You all can do the math. This was over 40 years ago. The lens is softer, fuzzier, perhaps even a bit gentler than when were all there running the one-mile loop before an afternoon practice or staying up far, far too late sharing the biggest possible bag of M&M's just so we could finish a paper in time for class in the morning.
Blah, blah, blah...where's all this going?
Yesterday, I got to hang out with my roommate. I haven't seen her in 40 years. That's a really long time in dog years or even in people years, honestly.
You know what I'm going to say next.
Our conversation picked up right where we left off. Not making that up. Hearts absolutely recognize one another and just know. They just do.
We did not even try to fill in any blanks. We just used all our words and I remembered, so clearly, why I loved her the most and why Mary O had always been my first and best choice as a roommate. She sees me for who I am. Then and now. What a gift to have someone who understands you for who you are and loves you completely anyway. Treasures.
Remember how I mentioned that we should be checking in on the ones we love? Showing up? Pick yourself up off the floor and just make it happen? Don't wait for tomorrow?
I promised Mary that I wouldn't wait 40 more years before I showed up for our next hug. xo
